Two Men In A Tub
Summary: In response to the missing scene challenge
Warnings: It's slash, nothing graphic though
Disclaimer:Shanghai Noon belongs to Spyglass Entertainment and
Touchstone Pictures. No infringement is intended.
Roy let out with a whoop, claiming victory once more over Chon in the
Chinese drinking game they were playing. Chon let out a weary sigh and slid back down in the water. He looked at Roy from the corner of his eye and felt a great wave of sadness wash over him. Roy was so attractive, so much fun to be with and so obviously uninterested in Chon.
"What's the matter? Tired of losing? Hey, don't feel bad! I'll give you another chance to beat me." Roy urged as he flashed a encouraging grin.
"I know," Chon replied sadly. He sighed again and started to get up.
"No! Don't leave now. We're just starting to have fun. Tell me about China, tell me about the women there. When's the last time you were with a woman?" Roy asked, his blue eyes twinkling mischievously.
Chon's expression grew somber. "I am the wrong person to ask."
"Come on, Chon, don't hold out on me, partner." Roy offered with a leering grin and conspiratorial tones, "Tell me all about the Chinese women and what you do to make them scream when they, well, you know."
Chon's head jerked up. "Make them scream?" he asked, in slightly offended tones.
Roy's grin widened as he winked slyly at Chon and confided, "You know, tell me how you make them scream like a banshee when they just explode underneath you."
Chon sat silent for a moment and then concluded simply, "Chinese women do not explode."
Roy sighed impatiently. "Okay. What do Chinese women do when they, uh, you know, uh, when they scream?"
Chon didn't answer. Several moments went by and still Chon remained silent. Finally, Roy could stand it no more. "Damn it Chon, women in the East can't be all that different from the fillies here in the west. It's just a question of technique. Like the way you use those chop sticks to eat with."
Chon had been staring up at the ceiling, wishing he were some place else, any place else where he wouldn't have to look at Roy and his glorious naked body. He heard Roy's question and wondered briefly if he had imagined it. He turned his head slowly and stared at Roy. "Are you asking do I use my chopsticks on a woman?" he finally blurted out.
Roy hadn't considered that and he looked at Chon more closely. "You do use your chopsticks on a woman? You eat her with chopsticks?" he asked amazed. "it must be the bamboo. Do you stick them up inside her and poke around or just the tickle the outside?"
Chon blushed from head to toe, first from embarrassment, then from anger. Carefully he stood and then half stumbled from the bath. He grabbed his hat and squashed it down firmly on his head. With a final glare at Roy he reached for the door.
"Forgetting something?" Roy asked with a devilish grin.
"No. I forget nothing." Chon bit out angrily.
"Our clothes aint back from the washer woman. You step out in that hallway and it's gonna be as naked as the day you were born."
Chon looked down in shocked surprise. How had he forgotten he was
naked? His anger soon turned to despair.
Roy said nothing, unsure just exactly what it was he had said to get
Chon so riled up in the first place. Finally he asked his friend,
"Would you mind bringing me another bottle from the bureau?"
Chon walked over and grabbed the bottle, starting to shiver with the
cold. He opened it up and took a long, slow sip, hoping the liquid
fire would dull the tantalizing image of Roy naked in the tub. His body
had started to dry and another long, cold shiver made his
body tremble. Chon lifted the bottle to his lips as he felt a surge of
defiance. Why should he have to hide his feelings? Why couldn't he
just look at partner and let his body's reaction tell Roy how he felt?
He swallowed the whiskey impulsively, gulping it down, ignoring the
trail of fire it left as it burned it's way into his gut. When he took
the bottle from his lips, the room was spinning. He felt his body
suddenly reel to one side and staggered in the opposite direction in a
vain effort to regain his balance. He clutched the bottle to his chest
and let his body fall.
Just as he was expecting to hit the ground, Roy's strong arms caught
him. Chon collapsed against their embrace and fell with a big splash
against his partner in the tub. Warm and woozy and especially delighted
to be closer than ever to his naked partner, Chon sat quietly with a
silly grin on his face.
Roy shook his head, confounded by his partners unusual behavior. He
took the bottle out of Chon's hand, and said. "What is wrong with you
tonight?" he sighed with irritation only to see the same silly grin
still pasted on Chon's face. He couldn't help but grin back at his
partner, then swore, "Damn it, Chon, you're cut off until I can catch
Chon laid back against the tub happily feasting his eyes on Roy. The
alcohol was working it's magic on his body. His mind might be willing
to perform all kinds of wondrous feats, but his body was numb and
boneless. For the first time all night, Chon began to relax. He wished
he could explain to Roy how much he desired him, how badly
he longed to pleasure him with his mouth and tongue, but he knew that
could never be. If Roy thought Chon found him sexually attractive,
he'd probably jump on his horse naked and tear out of town, as far away
from Chon as he could get.
For now, laying here in the bath with Roy, both men naked, this was as
close to Nirvana as he was going to get.
Roy looked at the dreamy expression in Chon's unguarded eyes, "what are
you thinking about? " he asked, suddenly curious what caused that
contented, far away look.
Chon didn't answer.
"Are you thinking about a girl you left behind?" Roy pestered
Chon nodded yes, eager for the lie to be believed.
"I thought so," Roy replied knowingly. "Whenever I have a few too many
I always thing about a girl I left behind back east." He paused for a
moment and then asked. "Want to tell me about her?"
Chon's eyes dropped for a moment while his panicked brain groped wildly
for an answer.Suddenly, he knew what to say. "She is beautiful, more
beautiful than you could imagine. She is different from other women.
She makes me feel so, uh, so..."
"I know what you mean partner. No need to explain. Did you ever, you
know, do it?"
A wave of sadness crossed Chon's face. "No," he replied sadly. "It
never seemed to be the right time or the right place, except maybe
once." He stared into Roy's eyes then and continued coolly, "but then I
was drunk and could do nothing."
"That's awful!" Roy blurted out and then offered the bottle to Chon,
"Here partner, let's drown our sorrows." As Chon started to swallow the
whiskey, Roy added playfully, "Good thing she isn't here today."
"Yes, good thing." Chon agreed, stretching his leg against Roy's naked
hip and wondering if he could possibly get closer. Then he smiled at
his foolish thoughts, and added, "Yes, a very good thing she isn't